It is widely agreed that girls mature much faster than boys, and as such, it was only natural that it would lead to more and more women choosing to date older men.
It appears that while young men are discarding their last hook up and embarking on a hunt for the next girl to fondle and flirt with, more and more women are choosing older men to date. Whereas a lot of men in their mid-20s and below feel they are in the prime of their lives and to have fun, women are seeking a more stable relationship, and many these days feel older men provide that more satisfactorily.
Local songbird, Frieda believes, “It depends on how old the man is, but I support it. Women naturally are looking for a provider and a protector and we have this believe that older men will provide that because they are now settled and more mature.” She says, on issues such as passion killings, older men are less likely to be volatile. “If you look at the media reports, most of the guys involved in those cases believed that the girl was just using them for money or that or something along those lines. He is still trying to make something of himself, whereas an older man is likely focusing on other things.”
Fellow songbird and this year’s NAMAs female artist of the year, Erna Chimu echoes Frieda’s sentiments, whoever with a slight air of cynicism with regards to the intentions of women who seek to date older men. “They’re chasing security of course, but I think it’s mainly about money. I don’t think there’s real love there. Some come from broken homes and are seeking that fatherly love, even if it’s from a lover,” says Erna. She also believes that the opposite rings true and that, “Some older women experiencing menopause turn and date much younger men because they want that excitement back, some feel older men are not satisfying them enough.”
Indeed, the potential danger with dating an older man has always been perceived as their inability to keep up sexually with their much more rejuvenated partner. In this regard, Frieda says, “I believe it is only a stereotype, that younger men are more energetic, while older guys can’t keep up. However, there must also be some truth to it.”
However, she believes not all older men are necessarily an improvement. “Sometimes you can find a man who is 40 or 50 and is still not mature and can’t stay out of clubs. Age doesn’t mean you’re mature,” says Frieda. She adds, “Naturally I am not attracted to an older man. It is not my preference.” Meanwhile, Erna Chimu says, “Older men are just looking for sexy ladies to show off. But if I can find a good one, of course, I would be interested in dating one. It would get me respect with my children.”
NBC radio presenter, Salomo Kambirongo, better known as ‘Lomo The Prince’ believes older men are better equipped to handle a woman emotionally and sexually. “Young guys want to flirt around but most women are looking to settle down or even marriage,” he says.
“Of course, a woman dating an older, financially establish man, can often be seen as a sugar daddy affair.”
Lomo however believes that there are just as many financially secure women going for older men. “The sugar daddy thing is blown out of context, if two people love each other and one happens to provide nice things for the other, there is no problem. That is, as long as one of them is not just in the relationship for benefits.”
An age limit for the age gap depends on each individual, but it seems the age old saying is indeed true, age is just a number.