johanna Van Zyl (35) from Otjiwarongo last week says she’s divorcing her husband of five years, known only as Blackie because he is gay
Johanna says she’s sick and tired of keeping her four year old son’s father’s homosexual relationships a secret.
“It eats away slowly at you knowing that you are sharing your husband with men. For years, I tried to live with it but I think I have reached the end of the line,” says Johanna.
Johanna says she found out that her husband, who is an auctioneer, was bi-sexual just a year into their marriage.
“There were always men calling the house. He’d check into a back-packer with a different man for a weekend. There was just too much evidence even when stories started to come out,” Johanna explains.
Blackie, Johanna adds, eventually confessed that he was attracted to men but begged her to help him change.
“I was very upset and I moved to Swakopmund with my family to sort out my problems,” she reveals.
While in Swakopmund, Johanna discovered that she was pregnant while Blackie was in Cape Town.
“My parents called him and we had a family meeting. He promised to seek help in Cape Town. I thought things would be alright after I gave birth,” adds Johanna.
A few months after giving birth, Johanna realised she had been wrong about Blackie.
“It turned out that he had a gay lover in Cape Town whom he was spending time with. I have a cousin who used to work for KFM there who told me how my husband was always in gay men’s company,” she claims.
She further says her shrink advised her to work things out first and then eventually advised her to file for divorce.
“I realised I was just a pawn in his games. He just wanted to be seen as a normal family man but his happiness lay elsewhere. It was not easy to make this decision because I love him,” she says.
With the help of her family, lawyer and shrink she decided to file for divorce last year and now the matter is at the divorce courts.
“We live in separate houses now but the only problem is his family who are accusing me of infidelity and choosing to divorce him after he bought me a house. It is not a fair accusation. My shrink told me they would only understand if they were in my position,” explains Johanna.
Blackie could not deny or confirm anything on the impending divorce, referring all questions to his lawyer.
“I really have nothing to say. This is a matter my lawyer can help you with. Talk to my lawyer. He might be able to help you not me. I have no information to give sir,” says Blackie before hanging up the phone.