Kevin Trevor, 25, admits to having instructed his girlfriend, Helena Mendes, 23, to deny his paternity of the baby she is expecting for fear of reprisals from his parents.
The Walvis Bay resident who has been seeing Mendes (who is now two months pregnant) for over five months now, says he’d rather die than have his family learn that he has impregnated a black woman, because his family has made it no secret that impregnating a black girl is the last thing expected of him.
“It’s deeper than just a racial issue. I had a good chat with her and explained where I was coming from with this,” Trevor justifies his sentiments.
He met Mendes at a sports event and after the event, he offered her a ride home.
“He charmed me all the way home then asked for my number before dropping me off,” says Wendy nostalgically.
She says her ‘prince charming’ took her for dinner a couple of times before he actually told her how he felt about her.
“He was different from all the white boys I had met before. Most of them are really respectful and upfront in the manner they talk to you but there is always that racial line that prevents them from making a move on you. Kevin was different. He started giving compliments from the get-go and it was clear he was interested in me,” relates Mendes.
Though their relationship has been fine, she says issues to do with her pregnancy are a bit complicated now that she hasn’t told her parents about the man responsible for her unborn baby.
“I don’t understand just how a grown man like him would be so scared of his parents like this. It’s obvious his parents won’t accept a black baby. There is no better, polite and smart way to explain that,” charges Mendes.
Although Trevor is reluctant to admit that his parents are racists, he says his father, though English is from the ‘old-Afrikaner school’, which does not approve of inter-racial relations.
“That is just what he is. It’s not really racism. It’s just a state of mind. It’s the way he understands things and this has to do with conservative ways he’s accustomed to,” says Trevor.
He insists that he still loves Mendes and that they have agreed to only inform his parents about the baby when it is a year old.
“I don’t really see why we are discussing this, because my girl and I have already agreed to tell them when the baby’s a-year-old. I will definitely support her and the baby. It’s just that the timing of telling my parents has to be right and I know things will be alright after that,” he adds.
However, Mendes says she only agreed to that arrangement, because she wasn’t left with any choice but intends to tell her parents about Trevor pretty soon.
“Do I have a choice? I know he will support me. My parents have obviously been nagging me about who my unborn baby’s father is and I told them I will tell them when the time is right and that is very soon,” she says.